Hiding Behind the White

If I told you I'd fallen...
Would you ask if I'm hurt?
Would you inquire as to my injuries?
Would you ask how I fell?
Or, like everything else I've said,
Would you forget...
Because your thoughts are clouded...
With stories from other women...
Making it difficult to sort out..
Which thoughts belong to ME?
Those precious thoughts...
Words I spoke...
Breaths I took...
Energy I gifted...
To share a part of me...
To be lost amongst them...
Thank you for putting me on a shelf...
Filled with trophies of other women.
Thank you for keeping up the charades...
Long enough to capture my heart...
Move into my soul...
And stake claim to my being...
Where the only thing I feel now is white...
Bare of emotions...
Exposed to the elements...
Of pain...
Of remorse...
Of longing...
Longing to feel me again.

Melancholy State of Mind

Truths revealed leave me weak...
Unveiling of the heart...
Roads collapsed...
Journey no longer mapped...
Now all is trapped...
Obstructed by deceit...
You had me at your feet...
Slowly I rise...
Aware of your disguise...
Lies tumbling out whisper hints of truth...
Truth of your character...
Finds me in a melancholy state of mind.

To Know is to be Lost...

In the calm of the storm...
I'm at ease...
Disaster strikes outside...
While turmoil bounds inside...
Actions hastened by the dust settling...
For certain another blow is culminating...
I'm awakened by the glow...
Of lies...
Of fears...
Of all those years of tears...
Nothing sets me free...
I'm captive and too hostile to flee...
Will I be...

Alone in this misery?
Where is all my company?
That's right...
Lost in all its glory...
But I remain to tell the story...
I am forever lost in the translation of misguided love...
Who's reverie is smug...
More like my drug.

Hiding Behind Expectations

If I wrote you a love letter...

Would you read it and ponder?
Or would you read it and wander?
Expressions of the heart...
Scribbled on a white glove...
Engraved thoughts...
Worthy of nimble responses...
Receiving mild interjections of worldly expressions...
My heart the only reflection...
Shattered with 7 years bad luck...
My only regret...
Is giving myself...
Wholeheartedly...
Care-freely...
Unexpectedly...
Reciprocation ceased...
Terms up, the end of my lease...
Now I have my answer...
If I wrote you a love letter...
The kind filled with honesty, fairy tales, and avidity...
Candy-coated lyrics laced with the nectar of honey...
You'd read it and wander...
Leaving me in a melancholy state...
Dangling from my blunder...
Of wanting more from your heart...
Giving less of my soul...
So, if I wrote you a love letter...
Would you read it and wander?
Leaving my heart to saunter...
Behind the gates of expectations...
A love only to be satisfied by fate's conjecture.